“Goin’ Through the Motions”
by Blue Oyster Cult

"Hey dudes, my name is Bob Oyster, the guy who writes the lyrics for Blue Oyster Cult. I just got some news from the record company. We're running out of money. We can't afford our luxurious Blue Oyster Cult lifestyle anymore. You know what I'm talking about. Fucking cocaine. Fancy women with fur coats. Shit made out of gold and diamonds. We gotta write a hit song, and it can't be about monsters, Godzillas, none of that shit. We gotta write a hit about love or something. We're pros. We'll just write whatever we can. What should we do? Yes? Tobias Oyster Cult?"

"Let's just write some shit that sounds popular. Listen, I don't even like being in this band anymore. I'm tired of rocking. I want to cash out and go float around the world on a boat. Davey Oyster Cult, what do you think?"

"This is bullshit. We used to care about rocking. Now, it's like we just go through the motions to make a buck."

"What's that? What did you just say?"

"I said we just go through the motions to make a buck."

"That's it. That's our sweet new hit. 'Going Through the Motions.'"

"Now wait a minute. What's this song going to about? Godzilla? Double Suicides? Burning for someone?"

"Uh, just make it about love... I got some lyrics right here, um...'It's a game, it's a game, no let's call it a shame / 'Cause there's no one to blame just to pay / You were a friend for a day, so don't cry if I say.'"

"Good enough. Now let's put some catchy, Cars-y synth lines in there and some party-time hand claps, some yeah yeah yeahs on the fade out, a smokin' guitar solo and some fist clenching rock opera vocals on the chorus. And just to make a sure we make the big bucks: An awesome key change during the last chorus."

"Sweet. I'm calling my fancy girlfriend and telling her she doesn't need to return that gold fur coat I bought her."

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